Ben Cudmore is a bit of an icon in the Mid North Coast community of Port Macquarie. As the founder of men’s mental health group Self Seen, he has become an inspiration to many, a well-known figure in the mental health space, and was even awarded the Hastings Council Citizen of the Year in 2023 for his work in the field.
These days life for Ben couldn’t be better. The happily married father-of-three is working in a career he loves, is fit, healthy and focused, and brings joy and empowerment to the people in his circle. But it wasn’t always this way.
A beloved figure in the local rugby league scene, and popular tradie, Ben’s life took a dark turn as he spiralled into drug use. His struggle with addiction reached a critical point in 2018, when he attempted suicide and nearly lost it all.
However, his determination to turn his life around for the sake of his family and community saw him fight his way back from the brink.
“I needed a better life,” Ben recalls, reflecting on his journey of recovery. His commitment to change not only saved his life but also sparked a newfound purpose: to help other men facing similar struggles.
“Along that road, and along my mental health journey, I became a better man, and I wanted to give back to the community. I wanted to be a better father, a better husband, and I wanted to find purpose and passion in my life.”
As he wrestled with his demons and started to rebuild his life, Ben shared his lived experience with his community on the “Happy Days” podcast and met another local man Eli Ihaia, who came to him with the idea for Self Seen.
“Ultimately there was nothing around for men to come to on a non-clinical level, so we wanted to create a platform. We began running workshops including breathwork, meditation, journaling and forgiveness, so our men had tools to use on their journey.”
“We decided to create a weekly men’s meet up and a fortnightly men’s circle. Now we have run club as well as monthly ice-baths down at Shelley Beach, which has been amazing. So, our goal and purpose with Self Seen is to not just save lives, but to give men tools, and to better their lives by giving them support on their journey.”
Since its inception in 2020, Self Seen has quickly become a cornerstone of the Port Macquarie community, thanks largely to the authenticity of its leaders. Ben, along with other group leaders, shares the unique perspective of having a lived experience with addiction and mental health problems. This firsthand understanding has fostered a sense of connection and trust among group members, as they know their leaders have walked the same difficult path.
“The more relatable we are, the more men we get to come along, and the beauty of that is they don’t come with a mask up, and if they do, they pretty much put that wall down when they come down here. They know they’re not going to be judged and they’re in a safe space. They know that there’s other men around from all walks of life, and we’ve had that lived experience as well.”
“We have amazing men in the group who started out as members and are now leaders. Along with Eli, Greg Smith is also a co-founder of Self Seen and he has been our number one man behind the scenes. Without him we wouldn’t have been able to achieve our charity status or our new men’s wellness hub that we now run our events from. Greg leads our fundraising. He’s the quiet achiever among us.”
As Self Seen continues to go from strength to strength, with chapters now in nearby Bonnie Hills and even Perth, Ben continues to lead by example. He remains committed to his mission of fostering a healthier, more supportive community. His journey serves as a powerful reminder that with determination, support, and a willingness to change, it is possible to overcome even the most daunting obstacles.
For more information about Self Seen and their initiatives, visit https://selfseen.com.au/ or follow them here: https://www.facebook.com/selfseencrew